Late Into The Night
by SapphicSlayer
Summary: Casey is lonely, and so is Olivia. So what do they do about it?
1. Chapter 1

Casey POV

I sit at the bar, late into the night, not really wanting another drink but ordering one anyways. The bartender passed me the glass, along with a sympathetic look, but instead of downing its contents like I did all the other, I fiddled with the cup. I had come here to drown my feelings, yet again. It was hard, working so relentlessly everyday, and then going home to an empty apartment to sit and be lonely. I didn't want to be lonely anymore, but what choice did I have? The only one I ever wanted to be with was one tall, dark, **beautiful **detective. But she had no clue about me. Why does it always work this way, wanting what you can't have? For what seemed like the millionth time that night, I went for my glass to erase my sadness. This time I paused to raise my glass to no one in particular. "Here's to you, Olivia Benson."

Olivia POV

I'm sitting at the bar, late at night, watching you order another drink. That has to be your fourth one tonight. I wonder if you're thinking about what I'm thinking about. How you go home to an empty apartment every night like I do. How you're lonely like I am. I've thought about it many times, but there is always one thing that stops me from going over to you. The fear that, in the end, I'll get hurt. So every night, I watch you, and I make my choice. And every night, I choose to be alone. Problem is, although I'm worried about getting my heart broken, it's already too late for that. Every time I watch you, it breaks a little more, as I think about what we could have. But not anymore. I order a drink. I'm tired of going home to an empty apartment every night. I don't want to be lonely anymore. I raise my glass in your direction. "Here's to you, Casey Novak."

Casey POV

As I'm finishing my drink, I decide that it is time to head home, as lonely as it might be. I shove a few bills across the bar and gather my things. I walk out the door and I'm just about to hail a cab when I feel a hand on my shoulder and a voice in my ear. "Casey." I turn and it's you. Of course it's you. I had finally succeeded in pushing you to the back of my mind until the morning, and now my mind was suddenly on overdrive, filled with thoughts of you. Just my luck of course, because you are going to say "Fancy running into you here," and then "See you tomorrow," and then leave and let me go on my way back to my empty apartment. Only now, I definitely won't be able to push you out.

"Why hello Olivia."

I find myself responding to you, although I know the best thing would be to pretend I'm tired and just get on with being lonely. But I don't.

"What brings you here tonight?"

Nothing, you say, it's just a place you use to unwind. Something we have in common. Great. Which means I can safely bet I will see you here again. Even better, I think bitterly. I'll never get over you now. But then you ask me if I want a ride home. And again, even though I shouldn't, I accept. So we get into the car, and I wonder if the lonely are ever supposed to feel like they are on cloud nine.

Olivia POV

I finish my drink quickly and give a couple bills to the bartender. I see you get up and leave so I rush out to catch you before you hail a cab. I'm thinking about what to do, what to say, since I'd never actually run after someone in an effort to tell them that I love them before. I catch up with you, call your same, and hope that you don't get in that cab that is headed down the street towards us. You turn toward me, and I don't know what to do. I need to talk to you desperately, but I can't find the words in me. Not out here in the open like this. So I offer you a ride back to your apartment. I reason with myself, growing more nervous by the minute. Right, that will work. I can say that you're on my way that I really wouldn't feel right leaving you to take a cab when I'm right here, that- Oh. You've said yes. Well in that case, I'll just walk you to my car… Where was that initiative that I had earlier? The voice that told me that I would be able to tell you everything. Oh. Right. I actually talked to you instead of playing it out in my head. Crap. I need to work on that. But as soon as we get into the car, I feel something else. I wonder, are the lonely ever supposed to feel like they are on cloud nine?


	2. Chapter 2

Casey POV

We're in the car on the way to my apartment, and it's completely silent. Not content silence, but awkward silence. You're concentrated on the tenth jerk the just cut you off as you swerve back and forth. You twist the wheel and I squeal, surprised, and my hand lands on your thigh. I don't know what to do, whether to leave it there, like I desperately want to, or snatch it back and stare out my window. I take it back, but before I can turn away, you turn to me and give me the most beautiful smile I've ever seen. I try not to think too much of it; after all, I've seen smiles before. But, I can't ignore that fact that it is making me melt inside. And, now that I think about it, you didn't pull away like you could have. Hm, what does that mean? Could you possibly… no, it's not possible. I dare to look back at you, and your attention is back on the road. But the smile that you had given me was still plastered to your face. I feel a smile spread across my face and I sit back I my seat and look out the window, not really paying attention to where we're going, but sneaking occasional glances at you. After a couple minutes though, I see you're your smile begin to fade. I look out the window, and see that we're almost to my apartment. I feel a sense of disappointment wash over me. But I also feel a tiny bit of something else, courage, and before I can think twice about it, I blurt out "Would you like to come up for some coffee or something?" I bite my lip, not believing that I just asked you up to my apartment. "Yeah, sure." Oh. Boy. You said yes. I wasn't expecting that. But I'll have to get over my shyness within the next few seconds, because I'm going to be in the same apartment as Olivia Benson.

Olivia POV

We're in the car on the way to your apartment, and I can't remember ever being more nervous behind the wheel. Don't get me wrong, I'm a _fabulous_ driver, but with you in the passenger seat, it's hard for me to focus. I swear as I get cut off for about the tenth time, and I jerk the wheel to avoid another driver on my other side. I feel something land on my thigh, and as I look down, I see that it's your hand. Oh man. Your hand, on my thi—I can't stop a monstrous grin from crossing my face. But then I don't feel the warmness anymore, and yet as I look over to you, I see that you have a smile spread across your face too. And boy, is it gorgeous. I turn my attention back to the road, but the silly grin on my face stays. I allow myself to think for a minute what it would be like if you, maybe, possibly… Nah, I shouldn't get my hopes up. But then I spot your apartment, and my smile begins to fade. Even though it was spent in silence, this was the best car ride that I've ever had. I seriously contemplate taking an "accidental" wrong turn so that I can spend more time with you, but I don't want to seem like an idiot, so I don't. As I park, I turn to tell you goodnight, but instead, I'm greeted with a question. "Would you like to come up for some coffee or something?" Wow. I almost forget to respond. "Yeah, sure." My heart goes into overtime, racing at the prospect of being in the same apartment as Casey Novak.


	3. Chapter 3

Casey POV

I take out the keys to my apartment door, and my hand is shaking so badly that I scratch at the look a few times before I'm successfully able to get the key in. As I flip on the lights, I pray that I remembered to clean up this week. Oh no. I forgot. Again. "I'm sorry about the mess," I tell you in a whisper, my face turning as red as my hair. "It's not a problem," you tell me, smiling. "My apartment is… well let's just say that we seem to have similar cleaning habits." Phew. I walk into the kitchen, searching for the hazelnut coffee I know I have stored in the cabinets. I toss my stuff down on the chair, and sigh as the aroma begins to fill the kitchen. "I love that smell too," you say from the couch. I turn, and find you looking at me. You have an odd gleam in your eye, and your mouth is contorted in a sort of half smile. I feel a jolt go through me, and I can't help but ask you why you have that silly grin on your face. "You," you say, your gaze never shifting, your smile never wavering. That just about does it for me, as my legs turn to jelly and my hands shake slightly as I bring the mugs over to where you are sitting. "Really," I stutter, as I take a seat opposite you, and let my finger trace around the edge of the cup. You look like you are contemplating the cup of coffee that I've just given you, and then you set it down. "Casey," you start, and I look directly into your eyes, the chocolate brown eyes that make me… oh, you're waiting for an answer. "Yeah?" I say quietly. "Tell me Casey. Tell me that you don't feel what's happening between us. Tell me. Tell me, that you have no feelings for me, please, so that I can go and figure out the next way I'm going to make a fool of myself in front of you." I see the hurt play across your face; you think you've screwed up big time. I have to stop you from hurting, stop you from leaving, I've gotta… answer you dammit because I realized that I've been staring at you. "I feel it Liv." And I start to cry. I cry, because after I say those words, you come over to me and with one kiss, you chase away all the loneliness.

Olivia POV

I stick my hands in my pockets, my head filled with thoughts of how this could turn out. I laugh softly to myself as I see you miss the lock several times with your key. You must be nervous too. As we go into your apartment, I notice that it is a little unorganized, and so do you, because you apologize in a rush of words. "It's not a problem," I tell you, since my apartment looks like this too, probably worse. You walk around the kitchen, I assume to look for the coffee that you promised in the car, and I think. Should I tell you? I know I have to eventually, since I see you almost everyday. I keep watching you, losing my concentration. All I can see now is you and every small movement you make. I know that I must have the goofiest look ever recorded on my face, but I don't even try to wipe it off. I want you to see it now. You do, and ask me why I have it plastered to my face. You, I say, with the voice of a confident person, even though my confidence level is about as big as a mouse. But it works; I see you sway on the spot, your face turning as red as your hair. You come over to the couch, eyes avoiding mine, but I know that I'm ready now to tell you, whether or not you accept me. But it needs to be now. "Casey," I call out to you. You answer timidly, as always. But I know I have your attention, and I let it all pour out. "Tell me Casey. Tell me that you don't feel what's happening between us. Tell me. Tell me, that you have no feelings for me, please, so that I can go and figure out the next way I'm going to make a fool of myself in front of you." And now, I don't know whether to think that we're through or not. I feel the hurt coursing through my veins, displaying itself on my face. But then I hear the words that I've longed to hear for so long: "I feel it too, Liv." And that makes it all better, because in a second I'm over in your arms, kissing you, and you chase away all the loneliness.


End file.
